Did Homeschooling Prepare Me For Life?

Hi y’all! I’m always asked about my homeschooling experience and thought it would be helpful to write a blog post answering the most frequently asked questions!

After receiving a bunch of your Q’s a few weeks ago during a Q&A, I called my mom and she agreed to collaborate with me on this post as she knows a LOT more about this than I do 🙂

I’d also like to preface with a few things if you’re new!

I am the 2nd of 4 children.

We all grew up in Jackson, Mississippi. 

My oldest brother was homeschooled for four years before going to an all-boys boarding school in Chattanooga, TN his last three years of high school. My younger brother was homeschooled grades 1-8 and then went to the same all-boys boarding school. They both LOVED that boarding school experience. 

I was homeschooled starting in the 3rd grade and my youngest sister never went to a traditional school. We were both homeschooled all the way through high school.

Also, we both attended an all-girls Christian summer camp in North Carolina for 5 weeks during the summer which was a huge part of our homeschool experience. I know that without camp, I would not be the same person I am today.

We don’t have a single thing against traditional schools. My parents had serious conversations with me every year about whether or not I wanted to keep being homeschooled or attend traditional school, and I always chose to keep homeschooling. 

Lastly, there are a million different ways to homeschool a child. No one’s path is the same. No path is right or wrong. This is simply our experience, and  we both (child & parent) learned a lot along the way.

Why Homeschool?

[Important note from Mom ❤️ : I’m not suggesting homeschooling will be a perfect fit for every family,  just as I’m not suggesting traditional school, private school, public school or boarding school will be perfect fit for every family. Everyone knows their situation and has their own story. I’m only offering a window into our little world because some people have asked and want to know more about our homeschooling experience .]

I truly believe the little seed for our homeschool was planted 35 years ago when I was in college in Texas.  A  good friend and sorority sister told me she was homeschooled, and at the time, I had never even heard of such a thing! She told me a few things about what homeschooling was like for her growing up in a  large family in Arizona . I thought it sounded really interesting at the time, but I just filed away in my head….  [under “C” for crazy idea…..  :)]

When our kids were ages 3,5,7, and 9, our daily schedule (between preschool, kindergarten, and grade school pick up and drop off times) included a LOT of time in the car going from here to there, often waking the youngest, Mary, from her nap  and hardly having time to read with any of them. I felt like our daily routine was controlled chaos in and out of the car and driving from place to place. I hardly ever saw the older two because they were gone all day. 

I felt like we were constantly in a hurry and I was always telling the kids, “Hurry, hurry, hurry!”  I mean, our youngest was 2 and her little legs could only move so fast! 🤷‍♀️

At the same time, Louise, a second grader, expressed an interest in learning Spanish. It  was not offered at her school so I looked into tutors, etc.. Again, I kept feeling this nudge to homeschool our kids. 

I wanted our family life to be different. I wanted us to spend more time outside together and eat unhurried meals together. I wanted Lou to start learning Spanish, and the kids to be able to sleep in later if they were tired. 

The homeschool idea kept coming up and, honestly, it felt so scary. If my husband and I took our kids out of school and started homeschooling them that would just be so ….strange. No one in either of our families had ever done such a crazy thing. Would our families think we had lost our minds?

And me? A homeschool mom? I mean, I highlight my hair and enjoy a good mani / pedi . Do homeschool moms even do that?  We’re not a family who grows our own vegetables, or composts or protests things… all of the stereotypical things kept popping into my head. Did I mention we had just hosted the big Fundraiser for our kids’ school at our house the previous year? They were asking us to be on the school board and I was already mentally unplugged.

My wonderful husband is our rock. Being  the stable, level-headed architect that he is, he refused to consider the radical notion of homeschooling. (Thankfully, he occasionally saves me from myself when I come up with a less than stellar plan…)  He and I are a team and I knew if he wasn’t on board then I would have to come up with Plan B. 

After a year had passed, I went to him again asking if he had thought any more about the idea of homeschooling. Whether he agreed because he was tired, worn down, divinely inspired, or simply being a peacemaker, I do not exactly know. Maybe it was a combination of all of them. But fourteen years ago we made the bold decision to take our three oldest children out of the private Christian school where they were enrolled and homeschool them for a year. We agreed we would simply “take a year off” from our busy pick up/drop off schedule and teach them all at home, then after that year, we would plug them right back into their school .

I was so excited about starting to homeschool the kids! But honestly, I felt as if I was about to jump off a cliff, I thought to myself, “Well, okay, God, I’ll jump because I trust You and Your ways are always better than mine …… but I am really scared, so please catch me! “  And He caught me. He caught all of us. And He has walked with us every single step of the way on what was to become our 13 year homeschool adventure.

What Did A Typical Homeschool Day Look Like?

(Mom)

That’s a hard question because our “typical” day would vary greatly depending on the age of the child. We did have a usual rhythm to our days, but again, it depends on the age of the child. 

I had a friend who was a veteran homeschooler and she and her husband had 5 kids. Once we decided to take the leap and homeschool, she really took me under her wing and shared what had worked well for them.

Following her example, I made daily/weekly “Assignment Sheets” that we gave the kids It was like a  to-do list for them -so the kids could “X” it off once they completed the things on their list. It also included all chores, etc. so they knew everything they had to get done that day. The Assignments Sheets were immensely helpful in teaching them become independent workers and I am forever grateful for my friend’s example.

In the early years they would finish their schoolwork by noon and play outside with friends in the afternoon. Our house was centrally located so it was an easy place for people to gather  and we had a big yard  where they all loved to play. The kids would play on the trampoline (yes, we had one, please don’t judge me), walk the dogs, ride bikes, play basketball, build forts or whatever. Eventually, we planted a wonderful garden, had chickens (one was named Beyoncé), and a cute little rabbit named Daisy. 🐰

Family dinners around the kitchen table were always a big deal and relaxed time for everyone to come together and swap stories about their day.  Afterwards, when they were younger, we would sit by the fire and Dad would read aloud. The kids would be in their pjs and would build legos, knit, brush the dog or cat, sketch, finish up an assignment, or do whatever they liked while they listened. Seriously! Sounds like something out of Little House on the Prairie -( I did always love that  show! 🙂 ) But this  became our new normal routine. I loved it. We all did.

As they got older(high school) they were doing more school work but cooking/eating family dinners and finding good movies to watch together in the evenings have always been an enjoyable part of our family life.

(Louise)

I can’t remember my younger years as well as I can remember my sophomore/junior/senior years of high school. Like my mom said, we had classes and tutors who helped give routine to our days and weeks. And I think a common misconception is that homeschoolers don’t leave the home all day. At least for us, I don’t remember being at home all that much!

My routine when I was 15/16 years old would be something like this: 

I would wake up, shower & have breakfast, make the bed & get ready for the day. Around 9:00, I’d be logging on to an online biology class and have that for an hour. Then, I’d have math class on Monday & Wednesday, Spanish class on Tuesday and Thursday (in person-taught by a homeschool moms — class size would be 8-15 ish of other homeschool students) and we had piano lessons at our home on Thursdays. Then I would come home and finish up whatever other schoolwork assignments I had. After that, I had tennis practice most days from 4:30-6:00pm.

Did you have to take your finals at a school to pass them officially?

(Mom)

Our kids did not.

They took the Stanford Achievement Tests ( SAT 10) in the spring of each year through a homeschool co-op that would provide that service for homeschoolers in the area. It was administered just as it would have been in a traditional school setting . ( It was taken in 2 days, two #2 lead pencils , in a classroom proctored by a teacher,  the regular drill…) 

Every state has different laws regarding homeschooling. Mississippi Law didn’t “require” us to do this- we didn’t have to send those standardized scores to anyone – but it was just something we did every year for ourselves. It helped identify strengths and weaknesses and see how everyone  was doing compared to other students their age nationally. 

(AND it provided experience with standardized test taking….which is always a good thing.)

As for finals each year, if it was something I was teaching the kids, I wanted to make sure they had really mastered the material before moving on to the next thing. (Translation: They needed an A.) So on their daily work they could always go back and do paper corrections and additional problems or questions until they were up to speed and where they wanted to be so that by the end of the year when final exams came around it wasn’t a huge deal because they knew the material.  (If it was a situation where we needed to slow down and spend more time on something, we could do that also.)   

As they got older their standardized test scores, resumes, applications and essays were submitted for colleges. 

Did you do your studies online or with a teacher or parent?

(Mom)

Gosh , there are as many different ways to structure a homeschool as there are types of people in the world. 🌎 

For us, the first year, we used the same curriculum the older kids had been using at the private Christian school they had attended. They were familiar with that, so we kept it the same. They learned quickly that if they finished all of their school work in the morning they would have time for fun things in the afternoon. Then we would have dinner and read together as  a family every night.

We read a LOT. When they were younger we actually took baskets to the library each week to bring their books home. They loved being able to pick books that they actually wanted to read. 

As everyone got older and became more independent with their work, they took more online classes and/or in person small group classes with friends a couple of days a week. They had team practices, swim meets, tennis matches, babysitting jobs, etc. so it really wasn’t like we just sat around the house by ourselves all the time. We did actually leave the house and had friends.  😂

*Note: Shout out to the parents and kids who survived  “virtual schooling” all day long at home during the pandemic and everyone who was thrown into the middle of all of that!  That is not the kind of situation I’m referring to when I talk about our homeschool or taking a class online. That was a hard  time for everyone.

(Louise)

Like my mom said, each semester was a mix of online, in-person, tutors, etc. depending on each child’s needs.

We do know people who did their entire homeschool online and that worked great for them!

How did you make friends?

(Louise) 

I think this is another common misconception about homeschoolers! The “anti-social” factor.

One way we met people was through a co-op we were a part of for homeschoolers. This co-op had a sports team (tennis, basketball, baseball, softball), they hosted a prom each year, and they had other social events and homeschool fairs.

Though we were a part of the co-op, I was also very involved with our church. I would go every Wednesday night and I attended every event the church hosted! I made some of my best friends from church. And they almost all went to different schools. I would go to their football games, track meets, school plays, or whatever their schools had going on and meet their school friends too.

I also mentioned that I went to summer camp for 5 weeks during the summer! I think I went to camp a total of 11 summers. I made some of my absolute best friends at camp and every. where. I. go. I run in to someone from camp. It was the biggest blessing for me and continues to be the gift that keeps on giving.

The homeschoolers I know are all some of the most out-going, smart, and kind people. They are unapologetically themselves and I love that.

(Mom)

I remember  hearing  someone  (who went to a traditional school) ask Louise about homeschooling, “So…  do you have any friends? …I mean, how  do y’all find each other?”  🙂

I guess the short answer would be … they met a lot of friends through friends and through organized homeschool activities or classes, and other places. I can only speak from my experience, but when we decided to homeschool, we were welcomed with opened arms by several veteran homeschool families. There was an implied honesty about needing each other.

Homeschooled kids LOVE getting together with friends. I think it’s part of the balance.  We need time alone, time to get work done, and we need to spend time connecting with other people. 

Like Louise said, there was a local homeschool co-op that offered information about everything from teams, classes, clubs , to tutors, as well as volunteer opportunities, social functions by age, etc.. It was a good resource and there are so many resources out there. In a nutshell, our kids found it easy to make friends within the homeschool community because everyone was super friendly, welcoming and always open to making new friends. 

Homeschooling provided us the opportunity to become friends with many different types of people of all ages and from different walks of life. Our kids had church friends, summer camp friends, tennis friends, swim team friends, and friends from other schools in the area. To me, their friendships  looked more like “real life” adult  friendships-people you chose to be friends with simply because you have something in common and really like being with each other. All of these friends were an important part of what made our homeschool experience so great.

Did you feel prepared for college?

(Louise) 

I, personally, felt just as prepared (if not more) as anyone else!

If you’re new, I went to Ole Miss and graduated in 2020 with a Bachelor’s Degree of Science in Hospitality Management. I was also in Chi Omega sorority.

Being homeschooled gave me the confidence to truly be myself and not care so much what anyone else thinks. 

I feel like homeschooling not only prepared me for college, but it prepared me for LIFE.

Don’t get me wrong, there is definitely a learning curve entering college social life, sorority rush, and course load. I definitely struggled at times and learned a lot!

However, I found that homeschooling equipped me with a lot of skills that I value today, such as time management. I work for myself now and have to manage my daily tasks to get things done in a productive manner. I still sometimes hear my mom in my head saying, “Is this productive?” She would always push us in an encouraging way to make the MOST of our time! And that has come into play in my daily life now. 

(Mom) 

As our one year of homeschooling turned into years 4, 5, and 6, I would sometimes think: Okay, this is nice and cozy in our little homeschool world, we’re all onboard now with homeschooling and seem to be finding our groove….but how will they make the transition to college? 

A wise person once told me the real job of parenting is “to work yourself out of a job”. It was an  intentional goal in our homeschool that our children would be able to manage their time, work load, chores, jobs, and other obligations on their own. We wanted them be confident in who they were and used to handling a lot of responsibility by the time they finished high school so that they would feel prepared for the next chapter.   🙂

Thankfully, they all seem to have handled the transition to college and beyond very well. Soli Deo Gloria.

If you made it to the end of this post – thank you for reading! I hope you found this post helpful or insightful! Homeschooling is a never-ending topic I know my mom and I could talk about for hours! So if you have any other specific questions, feel free to email, DM, or comment on this post!